Just About 34 Weeks

I'm doing pretty well. I just started dealing with tailbone issues and some back discomfort. Not to mention fatigue, restless leg syndrome, and extreme irritation, but these aren't things that are making my life horrible. There is no complaining on my part.

I still have so much to do before I have this child. I have to get stuff together and moved around.  I want to tour the hospital again.  I also have my baby shower in a few weeks.

I think, more importantly, I really need to focus on Carson and S.  They aren't lacking attention (are you kidding me?!?! My kids demand attention and keep demanding until they get it) but I don't want any drama from them after this birth, even though I know it will happen.

33 Weeks, 6 Days.  Baby #3

I haven't really started nesting yet. Is there even any time for that? I have been making hair-bows for my girls. They will have to match, of course... I have every intention of sewing, too. Maybe that's my nesting.

Actually, I am sewing to make a quiet bag for Carson for church. He is loud, with a capital L. I just have to figure it out because he needs to learn to sit now, rather than later.

Enjoy my pretty face!

On The Things I've Neglected

I have failed miserably at remembering that I have allotted every Tuesday this year as a "no sweets day".  I would be 100% successful at my goal if I had only remembered each Tuesday.  I suppose Tuesday was a bad day to do it and I guess if I started now I would be able to get in 40 days plus of no sweets. It's hard though...because I included artificially sweetened things too, like Diet Coke, but then sweet tea has sugar and orange juice and this list goes on! So, basically, all I can drink is water and while I like water, it's boring. I need a little pizazz to my cup!

I forgot to keep practicing to crochet, so now I have completely forgotten how to. I think I want to take a class, somewhere... I know the library here has a knitting class but that won't do. It looks complicated.
I think some ladies at church should start one up!

I bought some used picture frames this summer to make really cool DIY things with, and didn't do anything more than sand them down. They are in a box slowly decaying away. Actually,  I asked Tim to spray paint them a few months ago because I thought being pregnant, I'm not supposed to do it but I think I can.  Is that an old rule or still current? It's not his fault, I re-asked him again on Saturday if he could do it Sunday and he said he couldn't because his day was full.

I lost my mini clothes pins that I now need for a quiet bag because my children are very loud and active at church. I better find them!

I put off weaning Carson from the bottle to a sippy cup. I just can't do it. Really, I can and I will. I started today... I have only given him one bottle and I put a few away.  I have a few to wash before I can pack them up.  My plan is to put him on those silicone cups, the soft ones... and the sippy cups with straws. I hate the straws, but he likes them so whatever to that.

Lastly, I have seriously neglected Tim.  I haven't been giving him as much attention as he needs (and the same to him, lol). He also needs "alone time", something he has always gotten because I've made week long trips to Kentucky with the kids when he couldn't go.  He was able to basically do what he wanted without getting pulled in different directions. He won't get that nearly as often anymore so he'll have to deal.

Other than all this nonsense, I have gotten a lot done! Kuddos to me, and energy to me to get this other business taken care of.

A Snippet of My Thoughts Today

I have baby brain.  It's not a big secret, I have basically been pregnant for two years. That last month before I got pregnant with this baby, I could think clearly and my brain started working quickly again.  I miss that feeling. I really do.  I wonder what people think of me sometimes, people up here that have only known me like this*.  If there is any long period of time between this little baby girl and the next one, maybe I'll feel like myself again.

Not completely like the old Jenni. I truly believe people need to change and adapt to their life.  Though, the biggest problem with change, is that change isn't always a good thing. I see so many people go bitter and nasty. I have felt less anxious and depressed in these past two years than the three years before that. If that's just because of babies and pregnancies and it doesn't stick around after my kids get a little older, then I'll go back to therapy.  I am really hoping the happiness is because of maturity and a pretty good life.

My 'pretty good life' hasn't come easily.  It's not about material things, money, relationships, location, or any of that stuff (and I'm not bragging).  It's about acceptance and I'm not sure what exactly I have accepted or have come to peace with, but it's there and it's what I work on every single day.  I'm not saying I have laid down and died and stopped caring, I'm saying that I can't be motivated by anger anymore because it's not healthy.

I do get mad, I really do, but I know where the anger comes from and it's okay.  I get over it.  I do allow myself to be hurt a lot, but that's okay too and I get over it as well.  I would like to point out that jealousy isn't my thing.  To assume I'm jealous of anyone or anything is to have one of the most incorrect assumptions about me. I am about fairness but I can't make anyone be fair, that's on them. I DO want things, like a van and my own house, but I know that whether I have them or not, it's because of choices that Tim and I make; it's on us (and make no mistake that it's because of laziness or lack of action....it's about planning and waiting and we are okay with that even though it's hard).

Back to acceptance: The biggest thing I'm working on right now is peoples' abilities to completely have faith that there is a God and Jesus is his son and heaven is there (and don't act on it).  I hear and see comments all the time about Jesus and whatnot and see these people not active in a church or acts of faith but they know.  They just know!  I ponder about everything and actively choose to believe and work on my faith everyday.  It's a lot of work but I know it's better to believe and follow those commandments than to not.  I do have some amazing examples around me, so that's a thumbs up! :)

*I also wonder about what people think of me that have only been facebook friends, or relatives of the family I've married into and have never spent time with me. Or even my family that I haven't spent much time with since college.  Facebook isn't my life and neither is my blog; there is so much more.  I figure some people who have interacted with me through a second party could think I'm as nice as Jesus, or the most horrible person on Earth. I'm neither (ha), I'm not even in the middle.

It feels nice to write about myself again, but maybe I do that often!!  There is no way for me to possibly write down how I feel about everything I've written here 100% because this post would be too long. So, there.

Also, I would like to point out that at any point in time, I reserve the right to change my mind about anything.

Carson's 1st Year

We celebrated Carson's first birthday a week ago (more than a week ago, but around that time). Tim and I were so excited to throw a party for our boy and we feel so blessed about the turn-out. That little boy is such a joy in our lives!

Parenting isn't an easy task. I think for Carson, nurturing has been a lot easier and natural than with S, for various reasons. It's still a struggle for me to be a stay at home mommy every. single. day, but I know it's best for my kids and in the long run, for me as well.  If it isn't a challenge, it's probably not worth doing.

As for my boy... he's already running (fast, fast, waddle walk), has 13 teeth, and can say a few words while gibbering all day long.

Happy 1st Birthday, Carson! :)

Ice Cream Cone Cupcakes and Dating

I tried a new recipe.  I made those cupcakes in ice cream cones and the kids love them.  I don't really like ice cream cones so I haven't eaten one.  The cones turned came out of the oven a little soggy so I'm going to need to look that up and see if there is a way to prevent it.

S says she wants them for her birthday for her class and I already plan on making a few for Carson's birthday.

Kids love cupcakes in ice cream cones.  It's such a contradiction.  As a child, I would have hated it, it is like mixing food to me. I guess I still wouldn't like it since I won't try one.  I think it's the soggy cone. I dislike soggy things.

I'm making those cowgirl cookies next from Bakerella.

I'm still waiting to hear if S was elected student council.  The other kids running missed school (hello, that should show you who really should be elected) so they postponed their speeches. We are really encouraging her to get as involved as she chooses to, to hopefully keep her on the right path.

Carson got a big boy haircut and boy is he a cutie! He's been so fun lately, playing very well and he's just hilarious. Just looking at parenting differences between children is amazing to me and I finally feel like I'm doing right by my children.

Tim and I mixed things up this morning and went on a breakfast date. We took S to the bus stop, waited, then headed to Waffle House.  Waffle House is my weakness. Every now and again, the idea of greasy breakfast food makes me so happy. The only downside is how early it was.

I have read when you go on dates with your spouse, you aren't supposed to talk about kids, money, or work. Well, that's all we have to talk about.  Actually, this morning we didn't talk very much and it was a great date.

On the way home, we laughed a lot about things the kids are doing and how funny they are.  I'd say it was a success.

Maybe It Was A Cold

Maybe it was a cold!  I am starting to believe that Carson is not only teething, but he has a little cold, too! So sorry to all the friends we went around. :/  He's over the worst part of it and has been almost back to normal today! :)

I have it now.  This is stupid, why do I have to get a cold? I can't breathe, especially at night, I have a huge headache and the list goes on.

That's enough nasty business... I went to Olive Garden to eat lunch with my Sister-in-law, Amanda today.  I got that endless soup and salad. I filled up on salad and could only eat half a bowl of minestrone.  The salad alone it worth it!  I kid you not.  It must have msg in it because I'm addicted.

I also stopped by the dollar tree to get some things for Carson's birthday party.  I ran into a problem  while there: I only have had 4 people R.S.V.P. and none of them are children (unless I'm forgetting someone).  I have some pretty neat party favors in mind but I don't plan on over-buying things and going through the hassle of returning them afterwards. No way!

But, get this...they have the COOLEST wrapping paper. Oh, I lerv it! It's that brown paper bag material, and there is a lot if it to boot for $1.  Heck to the yes.  I love wrapping paper, I do.  I thoroughly enjoy picking out the prettiest paper and curling ribbons and bows to match!  If you have ever gotten a wrapped gift from me (in the past few years) you should know!  I have big plans this year with twine and brown paper. Big plans!

Oh, and remember how I said S was really involved with 4th grade? Well, this remains to be true...  She stepped off the bus today and asked me what I thought about her running for class president.  I told her if that is what she wants to do, then, great!  I can't wait to see if this results in anything or not.

4th Grade and Molars

S started 4th grade last week.  I really like her teacher this year.  He's her first man-teacher... I only point that out because male teachers seem to be strict, cut through the crap, but have a huge heart all at once. That's my stereotype anyway.
I think I have the start of a new girl on my hands.  She is so confident in her studies now.  Tonight she took the initiative herself and read an extra 25 minutes, then wrote 4 1/2 pages in her composition book. She wants to do well this year and that's not something you can make a child do.

While she's earning the gold star, Carson is grumpier than an old man. He's cutting his molars, and already has one through, two more spots are swollen.  This grumpier than grump attitude started yesterday and I'm already really really tired because of it. Lol, but this is the life and I'm not going to complain anymore about that!

I don't think I would be so tired, but Tim's caught a cold and he isn't sleeping at night, causing me to not sleep.  Every time he coughs or sniffles, I wake up.  I have restless leg syndrome when I'm pregnant and if I lay too long without sleeping it gets worse.  If I wake up at night, it gets worse than worse and it's just over. There is no sleep for me.

Worded Wednesday

When he realized I was leaving him for a nap.

Refuses to cry for the camera.

Cheeser

What are you doing? Don't leave me!!

Oh, you're taking a picture!

Happy boy!

First Day of fourth grade 8/22/2012

It's a...

Tests

Without saying much (and I know that's annoying), we have to go to a specialist with this pregnancy. Hopefully it will be a one time thing. We'll see!

We were supposed to find out the sex of this baby on July 3rd, but that has now been postponed.

Frustration level is a little high, just for preparations sake.

We had a nice week down in Kentucky, for a mini vacation. The daughter stayed a week and a half longer than the baby and I. She needed quality time with her grandparents. She rarely gets any.

So now we wait.