Thursday, March 21, 2013

Milk for Madeline

Little Addison was born the day before yesterday! March 19th, 2013! She was 8 pounds, 7 ounces and 20.5 inches long. She's adorable and has hair for miles. Kayt's relieved!

I had Madeline go to her Grandmother's house when we visited the hospital. I breastfeed exclusively, but I always wonder what would happen if something happened to me, or if I just want to be by myself for a longer while, what would she do? Carson had such a hard time drinking from a bottle when I needed him to and I just don't want Madeline to cry because she's hungry and doesn't know how to get milk from the bottle.

So I pump, often. I got a VERY nice breastpump from my mom and I sure put it to work. Plus, if I ever need to be away for a while, or I die, at least she would have a good amount to feed her for a bit.

Besides, I really don't want her to have a problem drinking out of a bottle. I actually fed her from a bottle yesterday. The milk was heated already and I had just got there, didn't want it to go to waste. When I got back, I pumped what she would have eaten. It's nice to see how much I produce at one sitting.

I wonder if the more I pump, the more weight I could lose? Not that I have lost any at all (with a great diet). 

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Staying At Home

Being a stay at home mom is rough. Being a stay at home wife is rough. Most days, I fall short of myself, and I don't feel like I get anything done or accomplished. It's a horrible feeling.

So what I have done is I have tucked this post away until I was feeling better about staying at home. I don't want to lead on to people that I hate myself or my job, but I do want to express how difficult it can be more days than not.

This is actually something that I never envisioned myself doing. I thought that when I graduated college, Sehara and I would have a really nice apartment and I would get a great job, or not even great, but a busy job and we would go from there. I never thought I would get married, I never thought I would have more children.

I think we are supposed to be challenged in life and ever-changing for the better. Staying at home with kids and having these high expectations for taking complete care of them, loving them, teaching them, making sure they stay alive, AND having to run errands and get things done for Tim is exhausting. It's rewarding, also. I think that this is more challenging for me than going out there and having a job.

I keep telling myself that just getting to love the kids, and know that they know that I love them and that they are my babies is satisfying in of itself, because it's true. You just never feel love until you love your baby.

Now, I see myself having two more kids with my husband, a house, a busy soccer-mom life, and maybe also having some kind of income-based job.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

My Kids

Carson is almost 18 months old! Can you believe that? Honestly, I feel like he's so much older than that.
He speaks so well and understands most of what I talk to him about. Oh, I love my boy.

I don't know what all the hype is about potty training. It make no sense to me. You realize that while you aren't changing diapers, you're completely responsible for taking them to the toilet every 20 minutes and getting pee everywhere. Doesn't sound fun to me. I don't have a set plan for the toilet yet, but I'm leaning towards just letting him figure it out when he wants. I want him to recognize when he goes, or the urge to go. We'll go from there. Not yet though, not yet.

Sehara is....Sehara. She's definitely a handful, but that's her. We're working on the attitude right now, and being respectful. She has turned into a little bookworm, and you know I'm thrilled about that! I love that about her. She's so into Barbies and crafting. She wants one of those American Girl dolls, and I think that would be fun to get her as a reward. Tim and I agree that at the end of this school year, or more likely at the end of her 5th grade year, we'll get appropriate highlights put in her hair.

Madeline is such a sweetheart. I love spending all day with her (except for when I really need a break). It's incredible to me that she knows when I need her to be relaxed and she's mostly tolerant of Carson's rough love. Her feelings get hurt easily. She talks all the time, I think she'll be an early talker (like, real words).